Engineers think that equations approximate the real world. Scientists think that the real world approximates equations. Mathematicians are unable to make the connection. ---------------------------------------------------- A Mathematician, a Biologist and a Physicist are sitting in a street cafe watching people going in and coming out of the house across the street. They see two people going into the house. Time passes. After a while they notice three persons coming out of the house.... The Physicist: "The measurement wasn't accurate". The Biologists conclusion: "They have reproduced". The Mathematician: "If now exactly 1 person enters the house then it will be empty again." ---------------------------------------------------- Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?" ---------------------------------------------------- An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are shown a pasture with a herd of sheep, and told to put them inside the smallest possible amount of fence. The engineer is first. He herds the sheep into a circle and then puts the fence around them, declaring, "A circle will use the least fence for a given area, so this is the best solution." The physicist is next. She creates a circular fence of infinite radius around the sheep, and then draws the fence tight around the herd, declaring, "This will give the smallest circular fence around the herd." The mathematician is last. After giving the problem a little thought, he puts a small fence around himself and then declares, "I define myself to be on the outside!" ---------------------------------------------------- A priest, a lawyer and an engineer are about to be guillotined. The priest puts his head on the block, the executioner pulls the trip rope and nothing happens -- he declares that he's been saved by divine intervention -- so he's let go. The lawyer is put on the block, and again the rope doesn't release the blade, he claims he can't be executed twice for the same crime; he is set free too. They grab the engineer and shove his head onto the guillotine block. He looks up at the release mechanism and says, "Wait a minute, I see your problem..."